Men on the Mat: we chat with CYH stUdents Carl and Son
Most yoga studios in the West have become predominately female spaces, so we wanted to delve deeper into the experiences of our male yogis. We sat down with Son and Carl, two of our dedicated male students, to understand their journeys, challenges and the benefits that they have derived from practising yoga.
Can you tell us a bit about how you first discovered yoga?
Carl: I periodically took classes in my 20s and early 30s. I remember eating some chips standing at a train station after a class one time and a young woman came up to me and asked me for a chip. She took one and then kissed me on the cheek! That incident placed a big yogic waymarker in my mind, so that I associated yoga with this strange, one-time ego-boost! I reckon I told myself that yoga had bestowed me with some temporary radiance that this woman picked up on. What turned it into a practice was that a friend of mine passed away in 2019 and, at her funeral, it became clear that yoga had become a force of positivity across much of her life. I respected her and I think learning that about her turned me onto it more.
Son: Work, as in life can be stressful at times and I was lucky enough to stumble across yoga and the Croydon Yoga Hub at a time when I was trying to find some balance. I am lucky enough to be able to work from home and infrequently venture into the city for work. This means that I have more time for yoga which is the spontaneous yin to the analytical yang of my work.
How would you describe your personal yoga practice?
Carl: On the formal side - it is part of my body maintenance. I think body maintenance is important and is comprised of 3 ’S’ - strength, stamina and stretch. I try to go to at least 2 classes a week, same as I try to go to the gym twice a week etc. On the informal side, I also do ad-hoc yoga’y things away from the studio - e.g. I sit on a cushion on the floor a lot at home, I stretch my upper body at my desk at work etc. I do those things to enjoy the little tingles and delightful changes in my body that regular stretching will generate. Like little self-massages.
Son: I have to say that the Croydon Yoga Hub is like a second home to me! I really enjoy the different styles of yoga. I love the teachers here with their personalities and classes full of joy and warmth. I am really grateful for their generosity of spirit and sharing of insight. I try to be open to new experiences and reflective, conscious that they are simply the guides and we are our own teachers.
Son, Croydon Yoga Hub Student
What are some common misconceptions about yoga that you'd like to address?
Carl:
That yoga is just exercise. It is also a form of meditation. It can take you to the same places as mindfulness or mantras do, it can turn down the ‘me-ness’ of being just the same as them.
That yoga’s perceived woowoo-ness is something to be belittled and ashamed of. The woo-woo stuff is mostly just terms and instructions for pleasant and helpful experiences you can generate through yoga. Wherever you do come across actual, absurd woowoo nonsense, you have a brain, you are able to use your reason and discernment to reject it. Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater!
That yoga is something that is exclusively enjoyed by the following groups - 30-something women, clusters of gay men and all white men with dreads who wear harem pants. These are each important members of the team but they’re not the whole team.
Son: Yoga in the modern world is primarily seen, understood and often experienced as a physical activity with well known postures such as 'downward dog', 'crow' and 'headstand'. However, yoga can offer so much more if you are curious and wish to explore other aspects of yoga. A cool looking pose, such as a headstand is not, in itself, the singular point of yoga.
Why do you think yoga is a female-dominated space?
Carl: I think that this is beginning to change. On why this is so - I’ve heard people say that it is the same as how the free weights area at the gym is a male dominated space - that is changing too, probably more so perhaps thanks to instagram and things normalising it and explaining why strength training is important. I know from my days of playing sports, a lot of men’s stretch, balance and mobility routines are limited to a quad stretch with maybe a calf stretch thrown in and that one where you place your arm across your chest and look in the other direction.
Son: I suppose yoga has had a long standing reputation as a "softer" physical activity with lots of "stretching" requiring lots of "flexibility". I was gently disabused of this notion after trying out athletic and dynamic yoga styles such as "ashtanga" and "vinyasa flow". Plus, it would be rather handy to be able to (nearly) touch one's toes when one is old(er).
How has yoga influenced your lifestyle and overall well-being?
Carl: Yoga has given me a way of being in my body that makes me less reactive, more ‘witnessy’ to emotional / disruptive events. A bit like how you sometimes see a dog shake-off an emotional experience. I still respond to these events but with - say - a 5/10 intensity rather than 8/10. Over time this has enabled me to be more confident, and balanced and helped me make better decisions.
Son: Balance. Go with the flow. As in yoga or life: we have agency and intentionality and can strive to do our best to the best of our capability without worrying about others.
Carl, Croydon Yoga Hub Student
How do you think yoga studios can incorporate men more?
Carl: They ‘could’ sell it as something functional and scientific, as men would lap that up! As I said, men appear to be more afraid of the intuitive, of the flow. However, I also think that is wrong-headed of men to need to be sold to in this way. For example, if some of the lads I used to party with knew the states you can use yoga to help take you to, they’d become demented for it.
Son: Well, I don't think that yoga studios need to do anything in particular to incorporate men more. Simply, highlight the fact that there are many different yoga traditions, something for everyone in terms of physical or mental benefits.
What advice would you give to someone who is new to yoga?
Carl: Take the assists the teacher offers! Turn it into a habit. Keep coming to the class. If you can afford it - buy some 1-2-1 classes. It would be an investment in yourself and those are the best investments you can make.
Son: You should try everything at least once. Go to a yoga class with an open mind - give it a go - you will enjoy it! Like many studios, Croydon Yoga Hub has great value introductory offers to new students. Try out different yoga styles with different teachers until you find the one which has the right vibe for you. Also, try out different studios until you find the right one for you.
What do you enjoy doing when you're not practising yoga?
Carl: I’m massively into improv and take classes in it. I like how it gives me confidence that the words will come. I do a lot of walking in the countryside. I can read OS maps and sometimes lead walks for my friend’s meetup group. I’m also trying to get better at recognising trees. Last week I learned how to recognise cedar trees.
Son: When not exploring different yoga studios I enjoy hiking... theatre... opera... via ferrata... reading... listening to music...
A big thank you to Carl and Son, their stories highlight how yoga offers amazing benefits and a supportive community for everyone, no matter their gender. We hope their experiences inspire more guys to roll out a mat and dive into the world of yoga. Make sure to say hello to them next time you spot them in class!